


Brightest Night

by Wanda_Zatara



Category: DCU (Comics), Green Lantern (Comics), Green Lantern - All Media Types, The Flash (TV 2014), The Flash - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Eventual Sex, Eventual Smut, Fluff and Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2019-09-16
Packaged: 2020-10-06 11:40:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20506373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wanda_Zatara/pseuds/Wanda_Zatara
Summary: Barry hasn't been the same, not for a long time, it still surprises him how a year can pass so slowly and so quickly all at once. It has been a never ending cycle of pain and darkness all gone in the blink of an eye. He doesn't know if he'll ever recover from Hal's death.All of a sudden Hal is back, as a violet lantern no less. But can Barry tell Hal what he feels? Can Hal still care for the person Barry has become in his absence? Will Hal's return be the thing that destroys them.





	1. Violet and Violent

Barry stared down at the criminal scum, he went by the name of polka dot or something else just as stupid. Polka bitch had blood trickling from their nose and mouth, he was sprawled on the ground with his money bag lying a few feet away. 

“That’s what you get.” Barry said darkly as he bent down to cuff the criminal, he hated them. He hated all of them, sometimes he could barely breathe because rage would swallow him whole and leave room for nothing else. Barry stood quickly and sped away leaving a trail of yellow lightning in his wake. He ran and ran and ran, sometimes he ran all night to shake the rage. Tonight he just needed a few laps around the Earth until he was calm. He stood in front of his apartment door panting softly. He still wanted to hit something but now at least he wasn’t seeing red.

He took a deep steadying breath and started to fumble with his keys, and entered his dark empty little home. He didn’t bother turning on the lights as he shuffled slowly to his room. Some nights when he opened the bedroom door he would pause and look at the bomber jacket hanging on the closet door. Tonight he couldn’t stand the sight and avoided looking in that direction at all as he peeled off his civilian clothes and slipped under the covers.

Tonight he remembered not to reach into the endless sea of soft, cold, bedding. Tonight he remembered he was alone and as the rage that carried him through the day subsided, he was left with the yawning chasm of sadness. It wrapped him up along with the blankets and carried him off to sleep. Thankfully it was a dreamless night.

The next morning the rage was slow to set in, he was too tired, stuck in that bleary state between anger and sorrow. He would take coffee except it hardly affected him due to his speedster metabolism. He arrived to work on time ignoring the tentative greetings from colleagues. He just wanted to focus on work and be done with the day. Then he could patrol for crime and continue the steady cycle that was his life.

“Barry?” He barely glanced up at Iris as she stood in the doorway of his lab.

“Make it quick Iris, I’m busy.” He said analyzing the case file.

“Um, I was wondering if you wanted to have lunch? Caitlin and Cisco and-”

“Eddie?” He asked flicking his eyes up to meet hers for a moment before focusing on his work.

“Yes Eddie, they’re all coming.” 

“Can’t. You guys have fun.” He said, Iris let out a sigh and walked out of the lab. Barry didn’t know why she bothered. She’d been unsuccessful for almost a year now and although Barry knew he was being harsh and distant he just couldn’t care, he couldn’t bring himself to care about anything or anyone.

Remembering how close he’d been with his friends and how after he Iris had chosen Eddie over him two years ago started the slow trickle of anger, the red burn that powered his waking hours, the only thing he allowed in his heart these days. As the trickle grew in strength he was able to move quicker and complete more and more of his crime reports. He was as detailed as possible, double checked all the evidence. He would never allow his work to be inconclusive, he needed to prove who was to blame and put them solidly behind bars.

Before he realized it his shift was over and he was fuming, all the murders, the unspeakable horrors he witnessed, all the families ruined, communities destroyed. It made his blood boil. He clocked out without a word and zipped into his costume. By sunset he’d stopped three robberies and broken up two gang fights. It wasn’t enough, the rage was roaring in his ears, he needed to punch something. Hard. He was huffing with the rage as he let it consume him, he could feel the negative speed force pulse through him, making his eyes glow and his body vibrate. He was running, pounding the pavement and looking for something, anything, daring someone to step out of line. Give him all the reason he needed to let loose. His yellow lightning streaked up and down city blocks, he was frantic, manic. He  _ needed  _ it tonight.

That was when a violet light descended from the sky, Barry skid to a halt and stared up at the pulsating light. He squinted as the light seemed oddly familiar. He watched as it darted above the city buildings, like it was looking for something. Then it struck Barry. That was the light of one of Hal’s enemies. Barry ground his teeth, his speed flooding his system all at once. In sprint so fast he broke the sound barrier with a sonic boom he was racing toward the violet bitch in the sky. How dare she come to his city, how dare the woman who once claimed to love Hal hover mockingly above and look for trouble. She’d found more than she bargained for. Star Sapphire would not only regret coming to Central City, Barry would make sure she left broken and begging for mercy.

He ran up the building Star Sapphire was closest to and with a mighty leap he launched himself at the lantern of “love”. She knew nothing of love. Arm reared back to strike he didn’t realize he was yelling until Star Sapphire whirled in surprise at the sound of his cry. Violet light pulsed and Barry shielded his eyes as he brought his fist down. He struck a violet construct and was falling, he righted himself and was racing down the building and back up in mere seconds. He lept and struck over and over again, always blocked by her damned violet light. It mocked him, so similar to Hal’s and yet so different. 

Barry felt like a pinball racing up and down buildings only to bounce off the constructs of Star Sapphire. A couple times she tried to attack him with tendrils of pink but Barry was too fast and growing angrier by the second. Why was she just floating there, why wouldn’t she put up a damned fight. Barry hit the side of the building once more and swirling once he reached the top he charged up his lightning and launched it at his foe. His aim struck true as yellow energy crackled and struck the shield.

In a sound like shattering glass the violet force field dropped, Barry felt his smirk fall as he saw Hal reeling back from the attack and shaking his head as he caught himself from falling. Hal. Hal Jordan. The Green Lantern. Barry’s best friend, and presumed dead almost a year ago. Hal pointed his violet lantern ring at Barry.

“That’s enough Zoom! I don’t know what the hell your problem with me is but you can bet I’ll kick your ass to the sun and back!” Barry stood still as the negative speed force drained out of him. Rage trickled away into nothingness but instead of sorrow there was the bitter taste of hope forming a lump in Barry’s throat. Barry slowly raised his hand to his cowl and removed it.

“H-hal?” He managed to choke out. Hal gasped and glided over to him, landing in front of him.

“Barry? What are you doing? I thought you were a bad guy for chissake!” He said laughing as he walked up to Barry with his arms outstretched. Barry backed up a step making Hal falter and stop, arms still spread wide for an embrace.

“Barry, it’s me. Hal?” Barry took a small step forward, his hand outstretched hesitantly. Hal didn’t move so Barry moved a bit closer.

“Carol if this is some trick or illusion with your love ring or whatever then I swear to god-”

“No! No, it’s really me! Look!” Hal said and removed his ring, with a glimmer the violet light faded and there he was. He was smiling a nervous smile, Barry couldn’t even remember the last time Hal was nervous. In a millisecond Barry was standing right in front of Hal, Hal blinked and looked down into Barry’s eyes. Barry reached up a trembling hand and gently touched Hal’s face. Hel smiled wider.

“See? It’s really me Bar.” Bar felt a sob slip out and then he was hugging Hal tightly. Hal’s arms came around him and squeezed him just as tight.

“I missed you too Allen.” Barry didn’t know if he would ever let go.

“How? What happened? Everyone thought you were dead.” He said tightly gripping Hal’s shoulders even tighter. Hal rubbed his hands into Barry’s back.

“I know, I know, I’m so sorry Barry. I can explain everything.” Barry buried his face into Hal’s chest.

“That’s okay just hug me a little longer.” So Hal did and they stayed there in each other’s arms, the sounds of the city far beneath them and only the rustle of a gentle breeze disturbed them.

“Okay. I think I’m ready.” Barry said stepping back, darting at his eyes too fast for Hal to notice the tears.

“It all started way back when we were fighting Mongul on the Warworld. Do you remember?” Barry nodded tersely, he didn’t think he could ever forget that mission. 

_ An unexpected explosion had opened a breach in the war world sucking out some of the leaguers. Zatanna had managed to create a mystic seal to keep anyone else from flying out but Barry was a goner. He remembered the suffocating feeling of being in space, how instantly the chill had started to set in as fear kicked in. He was going to die. Then Hal was there, his green light encasing the both of them. Fortunately everyone sucked out could breathe in space like Superman, Icon, Rocket, Martian Manhunter.  _

_ They headed back while Hal tended to Barry. That was when the Warworld had opened fire. It was equipped to deal with green lanterns and the projectiles pounded against the shield. Cracks were appearing while Hal strained against it. _

_ “Hal let me go! You need all your will to stop it!” He’d cried desperately. Hal only grunted. _

_ “Sorry Barry I can’t do that. Tell the others… it’s been a pleasure. I’ll miss you…” Then the green field had shot forward while Hal drew the enemy fire. Barry had screamed and pounded against the green energy. Hal fought valiantly for a few moments before there was a final explosion and the green light faded just as it slipped him inside an opening in the ship. He had screamed and screamed as he ran right for Mongul and knocked that bastard out cold with a sonic punch. After that Barry had never forgiven himself for Hal’s death, he’d barely come to terms with his feelings for his best friend _ . 

“Well, when Mongul’s missiles were pummeling me to a pulp, I knew it was looking grim. I only stopped focusing once I saw you safely inside. I was just about to make my move when a concussive blast knocked me back. I felt my ring fly off and I thought for sure I was a goner. That was when the violet lantern ring appeared.” Barry blinked in bewilderment.

“The ring said my love had summoned it in my moment of need. My love was strong enough to protect me. So I put on the ring because I knew I needed to get back to the fight but then I was taken to Zamaron with the Star Sapphires.” Hal explained excitedly, then Barry understood.

“Oh I see so it took you to your true love Carol.” Barry said, it made him feel a twinge of sadness but he was glad Hal had been safe with Carol. Hal smiled and Barry felt some of the sadness lift at that expression. He had almost forgotten what his smile looked like.

“No actually.” Barry raised his eyebrows in curiosity.

“Carol was there but she wasn’t what brought me there.” BArry wracked his brain trying to think of who else in space Hal had dated, there had to be someone he was forgetting, another green lantern? A red lantern maybe?

“See for a while now Carol has been leading the Zamarons and Star Sapphires, she’s the queen and she has been implementing big changes. She has set up training for new Star Sapphires to help them adjust to their powers and the heightened level of emotion, making sure no one goes mad from the transition anymore. Because of her works the Star Sapphires have become a huge force for good. Thousands of men, women, aliens, and every gender and sexuality of every species have been able to join. It’s incredible. Beautiful really.” Barry smiled.

“It sounds amazing Hal. Like Paradise. I’m happy for you that it’s been a good year with the one you love.” He bit back the sadness again so that he could only be happy for his friend.

“No Barry you’re not understanding. I was just there to train and gain control, I wasn’t with the person who caused the Star Sapphire ring to choose me.”

“Oh, well who then?” Barry asked. Hal smiled and put his hands on Barry’s shoulders, making him blush a bit.

“It was you Barry.” It felt like the Earth was pulled out from under Barry’s feet.

“W-what?” He stammered.

“Barry, I couldn’t bear the thought of you dying that day, I knew I probably wouldn’t make it but all that mattered to me was that you were safe. It took me a little while to understand it too, I hadn’t even realized I was bisexual until Carol gently explained it was a possibility. I feel like a bit of a fool thinking I had to be manly and a lady killer just to earn respect and stuff. Zamaron showed me it’s okay to accept who I am. Showed me how much I care about you Barry. All those times I’d rushed to save you. You are what saved me that day, my love for you protected me from Mongul.” Barry felt like he couldn’t breathe and tears stung his eyes.

“Wh-why, did you stay away so long?” Barry choked out. He needed to know why he’d been suffering all these months when Hal was really alive. Hal’sface fell.

“I’m so sorry Barry, it took me a long time to learn how to use the ring, to create from love instead of will. To figure out it was you I was in love with. I couldn’t leave until I had mastered the power, otherwise it could be dangerous to myself and others. Especially if you ended up rejecting me…” Hal said making to step back.

“No!” Barry shouted grabbing Hal’s arms desperately. Hal beamed.

“Don’t worry, if you did reject me I would be okay, I’ve had a whole year on the planet of love to get control. You don’t have to pretend or-” Barry shut him up with a kiss on the mouth, crashing into him desperately in case this was a dream or an illusion. He didn’t care, Hal was back, Hal was saying he loved him. BArry couldn’t wait anymore and they clung to each other passionately. Barry moaned into the kiss, he’d been dreaming about it for years now and agonizing over Hal’s death for months, it was like an explosion in his brain and driven by his heart. Hal hugged him close and the kiss lasted for an eternity. They broke a part gasping and Hal rested his forehead against Barry’s.

“I love you too Hal.” Barry said as tears trailed down his cheek. Hal chuckled quietly.

“I am so relieved to hear that.” Barry chuckled as well.

“Now, tell me about you? What’s with the black outfit? Why was your lightning yellow? I thought you were Zoom.” Barry glanced down, he had forgotten for a moment that he’d changed from black to red. Then everything else set in, how he’d been spiraling downward for months, pushing everyone away, being more brutal with criminals. Fear reared its ugly head, would he drive Hal away if he found out how much Barry had changed? What he’d done? What if Hal went as quickly as he’d come back. Panic started and Barry started hyperventilating.

“Whoah, whoah! Barry, look at me.” Hal said cupping Barry’s face and lowering a little to make even eye contact. 

“Focus on me.” Hal said calmly and Hal’s eyes began to glow a soft violet, instantly Barry’s heavy breathing subsided and calm drifted into him. He took a deep breath.

“How did you do that?” Barry asked.

“Perk of the Star Sapphire corp, and that you happen to be the one feuling my love. I have a high empathic ability and I can sense and affect your emotions to an extent.”

“Oh that’s good to know.” Hal smiled.

“It’s okay, whatever bad things happened, you can tell me.” Barry closed his eyes and opened his mouth to start explaining. This is when sirens blared from down below, it was like a punch to the gut. Almost a knee jerk reaction Barry whipped his head to the sound, body humming with the power of the negative force. He moved to look over the roof of the building, to see who would dare ruin this reunion.

“Barry…” He froze and slowly looked up at Hal who was staring at him like he was a stranger.

“Barry what’s happened to you?” Barry hadn’t even realized he was vibrating and that his eyes were glowing. He immediately stopped but it was too late. Hal had seen, Barry felt his throat squeeze up, the panic flooded him once more and he was gone. Running away from the roof, away from Hal, away from the past year. He had to get out of there were he would never be found. He could feel the sorrow more strongly than ever before, he wondered if this was how it felt when love died...


	2. Greenie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hal has a heart to heart with some old friends, and old enemy, and a past he hopes he can make up for.

Hal searched for Barry that night but to no avail, Barry was gone and could literally be anywhere in the world by now. Hal eventually had to find a place to stay for the night and managed to get in contact with the watchtower. They had rooms in the headquarters for overnight shifts or for when heroes homes were destroyed. 

“Hal!?” It was Oliver who answered the comm.

“Hey Emerald Archer, what’s new?” Oliver let out an excited shout and immediately Zeta beams appeared and before he knew it Hal was in the watchtower. A lot had changed in a year but before he could take it in he was being enveloped in multiple pairs of arms.

“Whoah, hey guys.” Hal said laughing in surprise as he struggles to wrap his arms around the people hugging him.

“Hal it’s so great to see you! We thought you were dead!” Came Dinah’s excited voice. Zatanna was there too, he was a little surprised to see her hugging him because the two of them had never been that close but he was pleased nonetheless. Hal grinned and sighed, he was starting to feel like he was home.

He tried not to think about how a piece of his home was missing and just enjoy the moment with his friends.

“What happened? Where have you been? We held a funeral for you you asshole!” Ollie said slugging him in the arm. Hal chuckled.

“And what is with that outfit? I thought Dinah and I had risque outfits.” Zatanna said eyeing him up and down. Hal blushed and glanced down at his Star Sapphire uniform. He had to admit it was rather skimpy. Star Sapphire uniforms were made to show off physical attributes and were constructed to be most appealing to the person the violet lantern loved. Hal remembered thinking Barry must be a bit of a freak, the plunging neckline, short shorts, thigh high boots, etc.

“It’s a bit of a long story, I promise to tell you all soon but first I need to find Barry.” Dinah and Ollie shared a look and Zatanna looked down at the floor.

“I’ve already seen him, I know he’s a bit different… but that’s all the more reason for me to find him again.” Hal said tentatively.

“It’s more than that Hal, he left the Justice League, he’s been avoiding us, he’s grown more violent while fighting criminals. I see his future slowly darkening.” Zatanna said quietly. Dinah put a gentle hand on her shoulder. Hal recalled how the police sirens had immediately set Barry off, his system was flooded with adrenaline and pure rage. He’d been so concerned for him.

“Is there anywhere he frequents now-a-days? I haven’t been able to find him at his apartment, or S.T. A. R. labs, even the west house had no clues to where he’d run off to.” Ollie winced.

“Hal, he doesn’t really speak to any of them anymore.” Hal’s eyes widened.

“Even Iris?”

“Especially Iris, ever since she and Eddie were married. Iris had come to us to try and get through to him but we haven’t been able to crack it.” Hal dragged a hand through his hair. It was worse than he thought.

“There must be someone, Ralph? Or maybe even Jay?” Dinah shook her head but made eye contact.

“There is someone… but you are not going to like it.” She said slowly.

“Please Dinah, I’m desperate, I need to see him… I love him.” Hal said with a half shrug. Ollie looked stunned Dinah smirked and Zatanna was grinning broadly.

“I think that means you’ll hate this even more.” Dinah said making Zatanna snicker and try to hide it with a cough. Hal glanced between the three of them waiting expectantly.

**. . .**

Hal was flying through the sky, a scowl etched into his features, Dinah had been right he did hate this, at first he’d been shocked but then the utter contemptment had settled in and slowly bubbled into hatred with each detail Dinah supplied him with. He tried to focus on his love for Barry, that he had no right to be this mad, it didn’t matter now. No matter what arguments he made in his head he could feel the cold bundle of resentment and to be perfectly honest… jealousy, grow in his stomach. It was a bitter after taste, Carol had warned him that jealousy was dangerous for all Star Sapphires. It was a twist of pure love, a step into obsession and selfish feelings. It could easily taint a Sapphires mind, like fear for a green lantern. Jealousy and obsession were what Sapphires had to overcome.

Hal finally reached the place Dinah told him to go, to find the one person who apparently knew how to find or get in touch with Barry. Hal landed in front of the bar entrance and considered for a moment and decided to take off his ring. Just in case his emotions overwhelmed him and he did something reckless. Hal took a few deep breaths, and remembered his training. He remembered Barry and that this was for him, it didn’t matter what had happened in the past, all that mattered was finding him and helping him. Steeling himself Hal enterened the dimly lit bar. He shivered slightly because it was freezing inside the bar, although he should have seen that coming. He wished he could find his bomber jacket.

Hal looked around and saw no signs of activity, no one was nursing a drink, no one was drunkenly flirting or cheering at a tv or lamenting their problems. There was no one in the bar at all, Hal frowned and glanced at the clock on the wall, it was 9 pm, on a friday night. Growing more weary Hal walked farther into the bar.

“Hello?” He called tentatively, had he gone to the wrong place? Was Dinah’s intel bad? Was this even a bar?

“Be with you in a moment!” Came a voice from somewhere in the back, Hal froze and took a few more breaths to prepare himself. He knew that voice, Dinah had been correct, hearing it made Hal more agitated that he thought and he held his breath as the person rounded a corner. He was smiling like a bartender should but when their eyes met the man stopped abruptly, the smile left his face as they stood there regarding each other.

“So, you’re not dead.” He said finally and walked to the counter grabbing a pair of glasses and a bottle.

“No I’m not, I’ll make this brief Snart, I need to find Barry, I hear you can do that, so if you’d be so kind to share then I’ll be on my way.” He bit the words out and walked to the bar. Leonard Snart or Captain Cold was very a very dangerous man. Even though he appeared relaxed Hal could see the man was containing himself. He looked like a wild animal with power rolling just beneath the surface, Hal just couldn’t tell if he would pounce or if he was merely prepared to defend himself.

“Are you sure you want to find him greenie?” Hal bristled but bit his tongue and nodded.

“You do know Scarlet has been toeing the line don’t you?” Hal nodded again, a scowl forming. Snart smirked and slid a glass to him.

“I’m in a hurry Cold, out with it.” Snart’s eyes flicked to his dangerously.

“Or what?” Hal almost growled but Snart continued.

“You going to bludgeon me like your precious speedster has been doing? Lock me away in jail like most heroes do?” Hal said nothing and Snart’s smirk grew. Hal palmed his ring in his pocket, in case he needed to fight and to remind himself that this was for Barry. That was when he picked up on the emotions rolling off of Snart. Now Hal smirked, Snart was a good actor but everyone’s emotions betrayed them, especially to the likes of the Star Sapphires.

“You’re in love with him.” Hal stated grinning when Snart immediately stilled, that dangerous look back in his eyes.

“I can feel it coming off of you in waves Len, you are almost as in love with him as I am. Oh that must burn you up, in fact I know it does.” Now Snart was on the edge of snarling.

“Let me see if I can guess right, Barry never shut up about me, how devastated he was at my death.” He placed a mocking hand over his heart to frown.

“Poor Lenny just wanted to cheer him up, he hated seeing his precious Scarlet sad. Did everything he could to get dear Barry to smile. You stopped your criminal activity, you shared your bed, hell you even helped the good guys from time to time but it was never quite enough was it?” Snarts cheeks were red and he was breathing hard.

“Now here I am, in all my living glory, the one thing that kept Barry out of your reach, ready to snatch him up and you hate it.” Hal grinned and took a swig of the drink, hoping to whatever powers were out there that it wasn’t poisoned or drugged somehow to ruin his swagger. Snart stayed silent. Hal nodded.

“I came here incredibly jealous that you and Barry had hooked up while I was away but now? I almost feel sorry for you.” Snart opened his mouth but Hal held up a hand and straightened growing serious.

“I don’t mean to patronize you but I do mean it. I know you don’t want to be pittied so I’ll make you a deal.” Hal walked slowly closer. He took a deep breath.

“I can make you stop loving Barry.” Snart couldn’t hide the wave of shock that hit him.

“Last I checked that wasn’t a skill set the green lantern’s boasted.” Snart said narrowing his eyes. Hal slowly pulled out his ring showing Snart that it was pink.

“I’m not a green lantern anymore. I mean what I say, there are two things I can do for you. I can either take the love you feel for Barry, every last ounce of it and store it in my ring as power. Or I can change the object of your affection. Maybe there’s some other rogue who loves you and if only you loved them back then everyone’s problems would be over.” Hal said gently. Snart scowled up at him.

“You’d like that wouldn’t you. Removing the competition so easily.” Hal shook his head.

“I’d do it even if you don’t tell me where Barry is.” Snart’s eyebrows rose up in silent question.

“I came in here, jealous and angry that someone else had loved Barry, that I’d been absent enough to allow someone to fill that void. I thought you were a criminal, someone just using Barry. Or that maybe I was too late and Barry had fallen for you as well but we both know that isn’t the case.” Hal said sincerely. Snart glanced at the floor closing his eyes against the pain.

“But now? I see you’ve been just as hurt and sad as both of us. I see you’ve cared for him, you might be the one person who’s kept him from going over the edge. Kept him from being too far gone, you have helped him and cared for him when I could not and haven’t gotten anything in return.” Snart met his eyes and the edge was gone, only a pit of sadness and longing. Hal reached a hand out and grasped Snart’s shoulder. 

“For those reasons alone, I could do this for you, lessen your pain, ease your troubled heart. It’s what Star Sapphires do. I’ve sworn an oath to protect heart’s lost and full of fright, one’s who are alone at night. So what do you say?” Hal asked gently. Snart sighed and took a step back. He pulled out a piece of paper and a pen and scrawled something on it. 

“As tempting as that offer sounds, I prefer to live with my pain, it keeps me going, fuels me when I have nothing left. I could no sooner part with my pain and sadness than I could with my cold gun.” He said with a dark laugh.

“It’s a part of me.” He handed Hal the paper.

“That’s where you’ll find Barry.” They shared a sad look and Hal nodded at him.

“Thank you Len.” Len smirked. Hal turned to leave.

“One last thing Jordan.” Hal looked over his shoulder.

“Barry is still in mourning, the changes he’s had, the person he’s become is all sadness and loss. You said I was the one who kept him from the edge but Hal, I think you can be the one who pulls him back. Please make him the man he was before. He’s been hurting so much.” Len said quietly. Hal nodded.

“I promise.” Len seemed to accept that and he walked to the back and out of sight. Hal sighed, he hated to admit but he could see why Barry liked Len. He glanced at the paper as he left the bar and stopped in his tracks. He stared at the address and description and he could feel a part of his heart break for barry. He took off flying and found himself praying again that the promise he made Len was one he could keep.


	3. Black For Mourning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hal finally finds Barry, the two star-crossed lovers finally have a long awaited heart to heart. Pasts are revealed, tears are shed, and truths are shared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It gets a little hot and heavy in the middle but it's just a tease. If you're not into sexy bits it'll be over soon, and if you're only here for sexy times you'll have to wait a littttttle longer.

Barry stared up at the stone figure, he came here all the time, Len was the only person who knew about it. Barry supposed he didn’t have to be here anymore considering Hal was alive now. God Hal was  _ alive... _ Barry just couldn’t face him. All that hope and love in Hal’s eyes made it so difficult. He knew he was being irrational but the thought of Hal knowing what he’d done, how he’d changed in the past year. It was too much, he knew he had been selfish and unfair and unjust. He had dishonored Hal’s memory as a hero with his violence, the negative speed force, his rage. Barry was crying as he stared up at the memorial for the green lantern.

Why had it hurt so bad when he’d never even told Hal he loved him? They had made no promises to one another, they’d just been friends when he died. Why did the thought of losing Hal again shake him to his core? He’d already lost him, surely losing him again should be easier, even if it was with a sting of rejection… Barry wiped at the tears and looked down ashamed. He felt like such a coward for avoiding the inevitable, he was supposed to be a hero, If Hal were still a green lantern he’d scold Barry for giving into fear. Barry’s lips turned up in a small smile as he remembered that. It was gone a moment later.

Barry decided enough was enough and even though it tore at his heart he knew he had to come clean, maybe when it was all over he’d take a break, run somewhere to mourn the loss once more. Somewhere no one would ever find him and look at him with pity, or fear, or anger ever again. Barry could feel himself trembling as he slowly turned away from the statue, he knew in his heart that this was the last time he’d visit it. When he turned away he nearly collapsed in fear of what he saw. Standing only a few feet away was Hal half smiling at him. Barry’s pulse quickened, his body screamed to run, to hide, his mind blaring that he wasn’t ready, it was too soon! 

All of it silenced when Hal was suddenly in front of him, clasping his shoulders with firm hands.

“Barry.” It came out a whisper, Barry stared up at the real Hal, blood thundering in his ears. Hal began rubbing Barry’s shoulders gently.

“I know, I know, Barry, I know this year has been hard for you, I know your emotions are a storm swirling inside you. I can feel them overwhelming you and I wish…” Hal closed his eyes. When he spoke again, his voice was thick with emotion.

“I wish I had come back sooner, or that I could keep you from being sad and alone ever again. It’s my fault you’re in pain.” He finished weakly, now both of them had tears running down their faces. Barry opened his mouth to deny that Hal was responsible but Hal stopped him by pulling him into a tight hug, Barry melted into his embrace.

“All I can do is promise that I’m not going anywhere ever again. I promise you’ll never be alone and that you never have to worry about me hating you.” Barry silently sobbed into Hal’s shoulder, holding on for dear life, the storm of emotion threatening to blow him away. Barry didn’t know how long they stood there for, for a speedster it felt like a small eternity. He focused on how warm Hal was, how firm and steady he was, a rock in the storm that Barry was more than happy to cling to. 

As the small eternity came to an end, so did the sobs that wracked his body. It subsided into quite sniffles like the ones you’d get as a child after a good cry. Barry pulled back slowly still uncertain what to do or say. Hal cupped his face and smiled at Barry. Hal went to say something when a huge lightning bolt struck the ground beside them, sending them flying through the air. Barry didn’t even know what was happening until Hal’s hands once again encircled him and that bright beautiful violet light encased them and slowed their hurtle through the air.

“You alright Bar?” Barry nodded shakily and looked around, he spotted weather wizard floating in the air above them glaring daggers as the wind picked up and whipped at the man’s hair and clothes. Lightning flashed behind him again as he pointed at the pair.

“I finally broke out Flash!” He yelled, the wind roaring around the violet energy field. Barry felt the darkness rise up in him, a glare of his own settling in, a call in his blood to fight lightning with lightning. Hal squeezed Barry’s arm and instantly it subsided. Barry looked at Hal who was smirking.

“I know he sucks care Bar, but why not have fun taking him down? After all it’s our first official team up in a year, our costumes are different, we’ve also confessed our love for each other. Hell, it’s a perfect first superhero date.” He said as his cocky grin grew bigger. Barry blinked at him.

“Care Bar?” He asked, Hal only winked.

“I think you’re focusing on the wrong part of that sentence babe.” A warmth bloomed in Barry’s chest at the word babe. He felt like a goddamn teenager again getting flustered at Hal’s words.

“I will not be ignored!” came a shout as lightning struck the force field. It shook a little but other than that nothing happened.

“What do ya say? I go high, you go low?” Barry smirked and nodded. Barry tapped his flash ring and the black suit sprung out and in an instant Barry was dressed and ready to go. Hal smirked struck a pose and his normal civilian clothes melted away as violet light formed his Star Sapphire uniform. It reminded Barry of sailor moon in a way. Barry blinked as he took in the uniform.

“H-has it been like that the whole time?” Barry’s voice hitched in his throat as his eyes zeroed in on the short shorts and thigh high boots. Hal smirked and turned around.

“It has, and I think it looks best from the back.” Barry’s pulse quickened again but for entirely different reasons. Hal was facing him again hands on his hips.

“It’s important to me that you know each Star Sapphire uniform is created to best attract the person they love. If this is the kind of style you’re into then I can’t wait for you to see the outfits I brought back with me from Zamaron.”

“Okay we need to take down Weather Wizard right now and go back to my place.” Hal nodded and the force field morphed into a ramp leading right to the bad guy.

“Bottoms first.” Barry rolled his eyes but blushed deeply at Hal’s words.

“Please, in that outfit, you’re the bottom.” Hal laughed as they took off together. Weather Wizard didn’t even get the chance to yell another insult.

**. . .**

Barry fumbled with his keys to open his apartment door, Hal was decidedly not helping as he pressed his full body into Barry’s back.

“Come on care Bar, you have super speed for a reason.” His breath was hot on Barry’s neck, sending shivers down his spine and shaking his hands even more. Barry grumbled and finally got the keys in the lock. With a click and a swing they stumbled inside. Barely closing the door before Hal had shoved Barry against the wall and was kissing all sense out of him. Desperately pressed against each other Hal clasped Barry’s arms above his head and ground into Barry’s hips.

“Holy fuck!” He let out in a breathy moan against Hal’s lips. Hal sucked on Barry’s bottom lip before latching onto his throat. Barry quivered as Hal sucked on his neck and writhed against Hal’s firm grip on his wrists above his head. 

“Bottom.” Hal said smiling against Barry’s throat. Barry scowled and with a flicker of movement Hal was now pinned face first against the wall, his hands held behind his back. Hal tried to hide a moan as Barry ground into Hal’s protruding ass.

“You were saying?” Barry said in Hal’s ear before sucking it lightly.

“I think we definitely need to go both ways care Bar.” Hal gasped as Barry bit his ear gently.

“You keep calling me that like it’s going to catch on.” Hal chuckled.

“I keep waiting for my nick-name.” Hal said pressing his ass back against Barry.

“I’ll give you one when you come up with something better than fucking care Bar.” Barry said with a rough thrust against Hal. Hal moaned out a faint ‘Deal’ before he suddenly stilled looking across the room. Barry frowned and followed his gaze to the bomber jacket hanging on the wall. Barry stilled as well.

“Oh.” Hal slowly pulled out of Barry’s hold and walked to the jacket. He touched it gently.

“I can’t believe you kept it.” Hal said softly. He turned back to Barry smiling

“I’ve been looking all over for-” He stopped seeing Barry’s sad expression.

“Sorry I just, sometimes I could hardly look at it without remembering…” Barry said closing his eyes and shaking his head against the memories. Hal walked over to Barry again.

“Do you think we should talk, I mean really talk about what’s happened to you this past year? Maybe it’ll help heal, I know my presence alone isn’t enough to shake it.” Barry tried smiling.

“Sure we can’t go back to what we were doing?” Hal shrugged.

“If you want, but I think this talk is long overdue. Maybe we should wait a little longer on the sex part?” Barry nodded, he knew Hal was right.

“Ugh, I can’t believe you have gone all wise on me. I miss when you were a dumbass.” Hal barked out a laugh and Barry giggled at his reaction. It was good hearing Hal laugh, seeing him shake with it was… soothing in a way. Barry blew out a breath.

“Okay I guess I better start from the beginning.” Barry went and sat on the edge of the bed. Hal joined him as Barry opened up and let it all spill out. How he’d changed his suit to black in order to mourn Hal in a weird way. He never told anyone that was the reason but he suspected they knew, at least Iris. He talked about how Iris marrying Eddie had been another blow, part of him had loved her since childhood, part of him loved her now and he couldn’t help but blame himself. Maybe he’d let his grief swallow him up, maybe he was too focused on using her to numb the pain, maybe it had nothing to do with him at all. 

After the wedding, Barry had grown bitter and spiteful towards criminals, he was more violent and attacked with a vengeance. Every one of them had Mongul’s face, everyone of them had killed Hal, all of them were responsible for Barry’s misery and he fed his anger and sadness with each punch. Letting it grow and spread unchecked like a disease or a wildfire until it had consumed him whole. He’d known that what he was doing wasn’t healthy or fair, it certainly wasn’t justice. The league tried to calm him down, his friends suggested that he take it easy but Barry couldn’t. Every criminal was a slap to the face, every crime was an atrocity, and Barry had simply stopped caring about them. 

Hal just sat and listened, nodded, and didn’t judge. He rubbed small circles into Barry’s back and was just there. Alive, and caring and just himself. Barry thought the affection might break him. Then he got to the hard part.

“A few months ago I hooked up with Captain Cold.” Barry said bracing for the disapproval, he’d certainly received a lot from Joe and team Flash. In many ways his thing with Len had been the final straw, the break in the camel’s back. Barry couldn’t handle the sting of disappointment, taht was the last time he’d hung out with really anyone besides Len.

“I know, Len actually told me where you were.” Barry looked up shocked.

“But… Len hates like everyone.” Barry said incredulously, not voicing that he’d especially hate Hal. Barry had never shut up about how sad he was about Hal and Len had been the only person who didn’t tire of hearing it.

“I know that too.” Hal said chuckling.

“He’s a good man though, and I really admire him for being there for you when I couldn’t.”

“Oh.” Barry said lamely. Still shocked Hal hadn’t immediately yelled at him and not quite certain how to continue.

“How long did it last?” Hal said trying to feign indifference but Barry could see the slight tension in his shoulders. It seemed Hal was also bracing himself for whatever Barry said. Barry paused and considered lying about it but he decided he didn’t want to lie.

“All the way up until last week.” Barry said internally wincing. Hal let out a slow breath and nodded. Barry wound his hand into Hal’s.

“It didn’t work out, I realized that I just didn’t love him like he loved me, I was using him to fill a void. Every void in my life, one so big that I doubt any one person could fill it.” Barry said uneasily. Hal held his hand back.

“Barry I’m hardly going to hold either of those things against you.” Barry smiled thankfully at him.

“It was fun and I’ll always care for him but I knew it wasn’t fair so I decided to set him free. Stop using him as my only crutch.” Hal nodded again looking down.

“Barry, I’m just… I’m so sorry I wasn’t here sooner, that It took so long to control myself and that I didn’t try harder to get to you. Or at least send a postcard.” Barry snorted.

“Greetings from Zamaron, the love planet, will you be my valentine?” Hal laughed at that.

“Was there anyone special for you out there?” Barry asked, not sure what he wanted the answer to be. He’d prepared for Hal to tell him he was in love with someone else when they reunited so whatever Hal said would probably be better than that alternative.

“Oh yeah, dozens of people.” Except for that, Barry thought bitterly. Hal smirked and shrugged.

“At first it was mostly denial, I slept with women, aliens, tried to sleep with Carol a few more times but she always politely turned me down. I was running from my feelings, from my desire for you mostly. I was so stubborn and pig headed.”

“Was?” Barry asked and Hal bumped his shoulder playfully.

“Yeah, it was a nightmare getting my Star Sapphire ring to work when I was in denial that I loved you, not to mention being Bi.”

“What changed? Or how did you figure it out?” Hal chuckled.

“Unsurprisingly someone had to bash it through my thick skull.” Barry snickered at the thought of someone hitting Hal so hard he realized he was bi.

“Carol and I were training and I sort of maybe lashed out at her because my ring was weak, my constructs shattered like my fragile masculinity.” Barry almost choked because he laughed so hard at that. When they settled down Hal continued on.

“She looked ready to bitch slap me into next tuesday but then Sinestro attacked Zamaron, something about revenge on me and eliminating a foe of fear. The usual. Naturally, I flew to defend the planet despite my problems. I put up a decent fight but I realized all I could do was cover the more experienced fighters. There was this one Sapphire who doesn’t have a gender identity, they were always kind and patient with me and honestly helped me come a long way. Orin’su was their name, and I saw one of the yellow lanterns about to defeat them, and instinctively I jumped in front of the blow.” Barry covered his mouth, worry making him grip Hal harder, Hal squeezed back.

“Barry it hurt, I was struck bad. Orin’su blasted that yellow lantern into a nearby mountain so hard that it cracked.” Hal said smiling at the memory.

“Orin’su pleaded with me to hang on for my loved one. I remember coughing up blood and being so confused at their request. I think I said something along the lines of ‘I don’t have a lover, but my friend Barry needs to know what happened. Please tell him’ I said. Orin’su gave me the most deadpan glare until I realized it. Oh my god… I love Barry.” Barry felt heat rise in his cheeks.

“Of course once I admitted it to myself my Star Sapphire ring became fully charged, my injuries started healing and then I was good as new for the fight. We defeated the yellow lanterns and after a few days rest and coming to terms with my sexuality and how in love I was with you Carol gave me a final test and I was good to go. I said goodbye to everyone, especially Orin’su and that’s when I flew here.” Barry smiled and then yawned.

“Wow, that boring huh?” Barry shoved him laughing.

“Sorry, it’s just been a very… emotional day.” Hal nodded.

“Will you stay with me? I don’t want you to go.”

“Of course. I love cuddling my Care Bar.” Hal said in a mushy voice. Barry groaned and shook his head. Begrudgingly it was growing on him. He’d have to think of something even more disgusting to call Hal.

“I’m too tired now but I think tomorrow we should have sex.” Barry said drowsily. Hal nodded.

“I definitely agree. Look at us, already such a boring domestic couple that we have to plan our sex.” Barry rolled his eyes, smiling despite himself. They crawled into bed, Barry was about to lay down when Hal stopped him and slung his jacket around Barry’s shoulders. Barry stared wide eyed at it.

“Hal you never let anyone else wear this.” Hal grinned.

“I know, I want you to wear it often. So you know that you always remember that I promise never to leave you again. And even when we do have to be parted, a part of me will always be with you.” Barry stared at the jacket around his shoulders and felt more tears pricking his eyes. He surged forward and kissed Hal passionately.

“I love you.” He said looking at Hal. Hal’s smile was blinding, almost brighter than a star. 

“Did you get that from the love planet or did you make that up on the spot.” Barry teased. Hal shrugged.

“Guess we’ll never know.” Hal pulled Barry against him and they collapsed onto the bed. Both Hal’s jacket and arms wound around Barry, they were both asleep in minutes. Barry distantly thought that it was the most peaceful he’d felt in a long long time.


End file.
